Life has a way of taking us places we never expected.
I've spent a lot of years making plans, chasing dreams, walking through open doors, and occasionally standing in front of closed ones wondering what in the world God was doing.
I've been a college student with big dreams, a teacher, a coach, a student all over again, a pastor, and an author. I've experienced successes I never anticipated and failures I never imagined. Some opportunities have changed my life, while others have ended before I was ready to let them go.
Along the way, I've been blessed to become a husband and a father. And somewhere in the middle of all the responsibilities, sleepless nights, laughter, heartbreak, and ordinary moments, I've learned that some of God's greatest work happens in the places we least expect.
There have been seasons when I felt confident in where God was leading and others when I wondered if I had completely misunderstood the direction. I've wrestled with insecurity, disappointment, frustration, and the uncomfortable realization that I don't always have the answers.
And I've learned that sometimes God uses the very things we wish we could change to shape us into the people He's calling us to become.
Looking back, I realize that God wasn't simply leading me from one opportunity to the next. He was shaping me through every single one of them.
The successes taught me gratitude. The failures taught me humility. The waiting taught me patience, although I'm still working on that one. The unexpected turns taught me trust. My family has taught me more about love and grace than I could have ever learned from a textbook. And ministry has reminded me time and time again just how much I still need Jesus.
I'm grateful for the journey, but I'm also grateful that the journey isn't over.
Because God isn't finished with me yet.
There are still rough edges that need smoothing. Still things I need to surrender. Still lessons I need to learn. Still people I need to love better. And still parts of my heart that need to look a whole lot more like His.
The older I get, the less interested I am in appearing to have everything figured out.
I don't want to just collect degrees, titles, accomplishments, or experiences. I don't want to mistake being busy doing things for Jesus with actually becoming more like Him.
I want to be an apprentice of Jesus.
An apprentice doesn't walk into the workshop believing he knows more than the Master. He comes willing to listen, to learn, to be corrected, and to try again when he gets it wrong.
And sometimes, the Master has to chip away at things the apprentice has spent years building.
That's not always comfortable. In fact, sometimes it hurts. But I've come to believe that following Jesus was never supposed to be about protecting the person I already am. It's about allowing Him to transform me into the person He created me to be.
I still have dreams. I still have plans. I still have things I hope to accomplish. But more than any of those things, I want to be faithful with whatever God places in front of me.
If He opens another door, I want to walk through it faithfully. If He closes one, I want to trust Him enough to let it go. If He calls me to something uncomfortable, I want to have the courage to follow. And if He asks me to stay right where I am, I want to be content enough to keep growing there.
I have no idea what the next chapter holds, and I've finally become okay with not knowing.
Because the goal was never to arrive at some destination where I could say I had finally made it.
The goal is to keep walking with Jesus. To learn His ways, reflect His love, and become a little more like Him with every passing day.
I'm still learning. I'm still growing. I'm still making mistakes. And I'm still incredibly grateful for a Savior who hasn't given up on the work He started in me.
The journey has shaped who I am, but it doesn't define who I will become.
That part is still in the Master's hands.
And I can't think of a better place for it to be.
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”
Philippians 1:6 (ESV)